My mother and I haven’t spoken in years. In fact, it may be coming up on a decade or more since the last time we saw each other in person. On the average day, I don’t give my mother much thought at all. But after seeing @alex_elle‘s letter to her estranged father on Instagram, I felt compelled to do the same.
I know it’s been ages since we last spoke. You’ve missed a lot; prom, high school graduation, college, graduation from college, my first serious boyfriend, my first serious breakup, as well as other major milestones like buying my first car and getting my own apartment. It’s funny though, because despite your absence, I have been able to flourish. No matter how much I want to complain, life is good, and for that I want to thank you. Thank you for leaving me behind. Hell, thank you for leaving us behind. For allowing us to reach our greatest potential without you.
Because of you, I have been able to constantly push myself beyond my greatest fears. Because of you, I am able to look at my family with love and gratitude; simply for being present. Because of you, I continually strive to be transparent, honest, and loving.
I now know that you taught me valuable lessons when you left. Now, I did not learn these lessons overnight. I have cried many a tear, and had quite a few battles with myself over the years. But i’ve used your example to better myself and no matter what, I know that every parent wishes this for their child; to live a life better than theirs.
Without you, I realized that I am not broken; In fact, I am whole. I am worthy of love and I am phenomenal beyond any typical measures.
So, I just wanted to thank you. Without you, I wouldn’t have become the confident, intelligent woman, that I am today. I wouldn’t be the happiest that I’ve ever been. I wouldn’t even be alive.
Thank you mother, for being you.
You made me.